You Were Never Supposed to Have It All

Welcome to this conversation

To Get to the Other Side, Episode 9 (aired 8/21): You Were Never Supposed to Have it All. In the midst of her own personal change, the uprising awakened in her city and the pandemic - author, writer and Fabric friend, Amanda Moon, has been thinking a lot about her place within a community. With a personal openness that invites you into your own, Amanda shares how Michelle Obama’s first podcast episode helped her name one of the big “shoulds” that get in her way as she seeks the other side in partnership, not alone. Maybe that's true for you too.

Key Takeaways & Homework Practice

Who is your “us”? Amanda shared a clip of Michelle Obama telling about the roles her parents played in her community when she was a kid and what she learned from it. 

In your family of origin, who was included in your “us?” What did that mean for how your family operated? What is the same and different for you in your household now?

“Success” and us.    

• Amanda and Michelle both shared stories of achieving “success” and then discovering they felt lonely. 

• “It is not enough that I succeed on my own, I have to care about what happens to the kid in the desk next to me...my father always taught us to take in everybody’s full story...you didn’t know what happened to them, we weren’t special.  As a result, if something good happens to you or you have an advantage you don’t hoard it, you share it...” -Michelle Obama

As Fabric we practice lives woven deeply with God, ourselves and others. How have you experienced your success to be connected to the success of others? 

“Help”, you and us. 

• Amanda shared an aspect of this pandemic time for her: “It is very easy to get caught up in me, myself, and my family. Part of that independence is also not wanting to be a burden— or ask for help. I *should* be able to handle all of this. I *should* be doing better.” 

• “There are some things we can’t do by ourselves.”  - B. Obama  

What “shoulds” have you internalized about needing and asking for help? How has the pandemic affected your sense of independence and interdependence? 

“The other side I want to get to is one where help flows freely - to, from and between each of us so that big challenges don't seem so big anymore. You were never meant to have it all, or do it all by yourself. Neither was I. Let's let some help flow this week!” -Amanda Moon

Homework Practice: "There are some things we can't do by ourselves." This week, think about what you need from your community. Where could you use some help? And here is my real challenge - ask for help.  Practice asking for the help you need and look for ways you can offer help to someone who may not be ready to ask.